My cousin’s big fat Pakistani wedding
When I was younger I used to hate weddings. They were such a bore and in all fairness, some weddings still can be. However, now as a young woman who uncovered deep rooted respect and love for her culture, weddings have become a whirlwind affair.
Maybe it’s thanks to social media, technology, changing taste or all of the above that now (some) weddings have gone from being family affairs to big spectacles. Maybe it was always like this but because of the absence of social media it wasn’t prevalent…like many other things today that's for sure.
Either way one thing is for certain; there’s nothing quite like a South Asian wedding. Till this day it makes me so mad at whoever was responsible for the styling of Parvati and Padma Patel in Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire. There was nothing wrong with their outfits or styling per se, but it did not reflect the very best of Pakistani/Indian clothing. It reflected the worst; it wasn't high taste but a poor representation of the craftsmanship South Asia is capable of and known for.
And then add the moment when one of them turns around to compliment Hermoine coming down the stairs with “she’s so beautiful”, you have screen time of subconscious prejudice personified and the toxic reinforcement of there only being one kind of beauty. For this scene to happen, you can see why the brown girls' clothing had to be positioned as being less beautiful and more 'ethnic' reinforcing what is acceptably desirable.
Well, now that I’ve finished psychoanalysing Harry Potter, moving on…
My cousin recently married and as is trending these days, the already three - four events that Pakistani weddings are renowned for, were stretched over a period of four - six weeks. I can't complain because the time in between was a much needed break but September ended up being a stupid busy and tiring month.
Though I love Pakistani clothes (see here for where mine were from) I don't often go all out on hair and make up. However, as this was a family wedding I decided to try styles I wouldn't ordinarily have done. Here's a glimpse of the festivities.
Ax
The Nikkah
…is the name of the Islamic ceremony.
The Mayun
The ceremony which you put turmeric on the bride (and sometimes the groom). Though traditionally it involves applying turmeric paste on the bride’s arms, face and legs, the modern day version exists as a ritual where you symbolically spread turmeric on a banana leaf placed on the bride’s hands.
The Mehndi
Traditionally the Mehndhi custom consisted of the day the bride put henna on her hands in lead up to her wedding. Now it’s just a big party with a lot of dancing mayhem…
The reception
More life…
